Friday, 11 February 2011



Right; so this parts of love which will have rather personal stuff on it, so sorry if i depress people :).

Ever since i was 14 i started to fall into crowds with people which took me down the path of alcohol and lots of drugs - which i promised my family i would never do as i have a very religious family ( im not religious ).

I started to fall inlove with a girl name Kathleen ( Kitty for short )
we was really great friends and did everything together which made us so good as friends, until the day we had an arguement & stopped being friends, a few months later we started again as friends
which then turned into a drunken night where we had sex.

I used a condom and everything but i wasnt able to put it on so she did it for me, a few months after the sexual encounter we fell out BIG time and she walked out of my life. Later would i find out 6 months later she was pregnant with my child, which brought on many different emotions
but most of all i was always going to be there for her through the whole pregnancy.

A few weeks after she announced she was pregnant i was given the bad news that she lost the child which brought once again more emotions instead of happy ones i was slipping into deep depression and i later was made to go to councilling.

Then when i was 16 i came out as bisexual which shocked many of my beloved family and friends which has later caused complications in my life & now im forever struggling with the grief and upset.
I've experimented with both sex's ( boys & girls ) but ive never been into sex because in my perspective a relationship isn't always about sex, which has shocked many of the people i date.

Half way through 2010 i fell inlove with someone i thought was the best in my life, the first few months were everything i ever dreamt of & could wish for. Then a day after my 18th birthday ( wasn't the best year ) i was later to find out i was being accused of cheating which i swore down that i would NEVER commit as i find cheating disgusting but hey we all make mistakes.

I was then dumped after proving the best i could that i wasn't cheating which left me severely shattered and heart broken, i didn't know how i would recover from the pain i was feeling. After a few grueling months i finally got over the pain after having an emotional breakdown and falling into yet another encounter with drugs, which still to this day im fighting the battle against.

I sometimes get pressured into smoking weed ( cannabis ) i tend to smoke alot of this drug because i get such a high off it, - which disgusts me because i can do other things to get my highs, but nobodys perfect? but nowadays i tend to just go with the flow because i have friends that love me inside + out, which would make anybody happy, & im enjoying my life as it is right now.

I just wanted to give to give you all an insight on my experiences with love -
which haven't really been the best im afraid to admit, but i have
i dont want to make you feel like you wont ever be happy, or wont fall inlove with someone
but just keep your heads held high & live your life + love your family and friends.
If you do fall inlove with someone cherish every single moment + memory you have together
because you never know what you have until its gone. But thank you all.


  1. with all my past relationship experiences, i don't think i will ever be in one for a long time, the past couple GF's i've had turned out to be total bitches

    there are days where i'll try and do something nice for them basically get no recognition and they tell me how disappointed they are and how i could have made it better

    so yea, its gonna be awhile before i fall in love again

  2. Sounds like the story of my life. I too got caught up in groups that centered around alcohol and drugs and it didn't lead me down a good path. Everything is turning around now but I would like to offer up my abbreviated story to spark some thought